Craigslist

I am still having trouble deleting emails from Craigslist. Somehow these emails and their pictures have become such a part of my life. It is hard to delete and hard to let go.

But this afternoon, however hard it was and however much the natural man mourned the deletion, I deleted the emails. Though not until after I took a quick peek at some of the pictures.

Supposedly it was a last hurrah, but it charged my emotions and stirred up the natural man. I figured if that is what is happening, then the best thing to do is delete.

I deleted and felt regret for deleting, this was my bank of photos, this was my alternate life. Now I am deleting this alter-ego I had created over the past five years. It is hard, but I suppose it is necessary for me to reconcile myself to God.

I did delete and felt a small sense of accomplishment, but moreover I felt a part of me died. I am missing these emails, this life I created for myself. But I desire to be found clean before God, thus I hope to be able to "see my weakness."

Craigslist. You are done!