For the natural man is an enemy to God, and has been from the fall of Adam, and will be, forever and ever, unless he yields to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, and putteth off the natural man and becometh a saint through the atonement of Christ the Lord, and becometh as a child, submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him, even as a child doth submit to his father.

- Mosiah 3:19

Monday, September 12, 2011

Gay Best Friend...Auggggh!

So this weekend, in addition to my Bishop, I realized the girl I had been quasi-dating for the last year or so, once I disclosed what was going on (a while back) now sees me as her gay best friend. I started to get a sense of this on one of our "dates." A week or so back she couldn't wait to have dinner with me, I was excited, perhaps by the probable impossibility of where the relationship might go, despite the disclosure. I got to her house and knocked on her door, she answered and then she ran back to her room and quickly came back with an armful of clothes and started modeling dresses and showing me the new clothes she bought and then started talking about the crush she had on a guy. I realized that I had descended into being the "gay best friend." A role I refuse to play.

Needless to say, my disclosure has turned yet another girl into thinking I want to be her "gay best friend." I stopped taking the phone calls of one girl I dated a BYU, she kept wanting to talk to me about her guy crushes, fashion, and so forth. I refused to play that role, so I've spoken to her only periodically over the past several years, avoiding any semblance of her treating me like the gay friend.

Let me say this clearly if one of the girls I dated or may date happens on this: I don't know anything about fashion (really I don't - I'm color blind!), I don't like Lady Gaga or Musicals (I think I swallow a bit of my own vomit when I hear them!), I don't want to hear about your man troubles (I'm trying to be celibate, so talking about relationships does not help me!), and I will not prance around or pretend to be excited by girly things (I like guys, that's not to be mistaken with liking girly things!).

OK. I'm done for today.